Monday, October 20, 2008

89 Year-Old Woman Arrested for Keeping Kids' Football

Police in the Cincinnati Ohio suburb of Blue Ash arrested an 89 year-old woman on a charge of petty theft for allegedly keeping a kids' football that was kicked into her yard. Police say that there is an ongoing dispute between the woman and the neighborhood kids.

I don't care what sort of an old grouch she might be, and I don't care how annoying or delinquent these kids are, the police have absolutely no business getting involved with matters this petty.

Buy the kids a new football and tell them the next time it goes into this lady's yard, they buy the next one themselves.

One time when I was a kid about 8 years old, my friend and I were on our little scooters cutting through a gravel driveway behind some apartment buildings. Apparently we were annoying the landlord because he came out and took our scooters from us and told us to never come back.

Now my friend's dad was home at the time, a little Armenian guy who was tough as nails. When he got wind of what happened, he cornered the landlord and in a matter of seconds we had our scooters back. I never found out what my friend's dad said to the man, but I am quite certain it had something to do with inserting his head up his ass.

No police, no trouble, simple solution. Whatever happened to our ability to solve our own problems? Calling the police over a lost football is incredibly weak-minded, and less than infantile.

This news story is certainly fated to get a lot of attention over the next few days for the sheer lunacy of all the people involved. This case is so stupid and insignificant that even Judge Judy wouldn't touch it.

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